Haikus for 42

Perimenopause                             
Anti-aging creams, acne 
Hot flashes, sneeze-pee                             

Walk into a room,                           
Forget why I ever went.                               
What was I saying?                    

Neck, what has happened?                
Has your elastic worn out?              
How dare you give up!                    

  (Haiku for Jiujitsu at 42)

See me on the floor,                         

Old enough to be your mom                    

I will choke you out.                         

Oh give me a home,
Where Botox fairies do roam,
And all clothes are Spanx.

Embrace the crows feet.

Make peace with your muffin top.

At least you're not dead.

I'm stronger, braver,
Wiser, happier, kinder.
'Cause I eat fiber.

Wish to be younger?

Smoother, perkier, no grays?

Nah, I'm good right here.