Blog by a Dummi

Blogging For by a Dummies


My blog is doing ok. Especially considering how little I know about the whole thing (yes still) and how anti-social I am. It’s not that I don’t like people, they just make me uncomfortable. Yes, really. So strange they are, what with all their body hair and opposable thumbs. 

But, again, the blog is doing ok despite me and by that I mean I’m averaging about…oh, I don’t know like around a dozen folks a day. I think. (Pretty sure it would be better for business if I lied and said my daily numbers rival Candy Crush but I’m not a liar unless it makes a post funnier in which case it is justified. Here  it’s just not. Also, I know my # of readers isn’t impressive compared to other blogs. But, if there’s one thing I’ve learned by still shopping in the kids department, it’s not to compare myself to others.) I’ve a little following outside the blessed motherland - and I don’t mean Texas. I mean internationally. Good to know my tyrannical rants, ill conceived notions and social awkwardness translate.

The blog is its own animal at this point is what I’m getting at. It lives beyond my laboratory and I figured I should make it better. Slap a little lipstick on it. So, I looked up what makes a great blog. Here’s what I found and I wish I’d never seen. Some are from, in fact, Blogging for Dummies.

Suggestion 1:
Update Often! Every two or three days!


Say what? Every two or three days? What could I possibly say every two or three days that anyone would want to hear except, congratulations, you’re a winner. Apparently though, it doesn’t matter how mundane. People like their blogs like their BMs: regular. Which, mine pretty much are thank you very much. Thank you, kale. But, again, what would I say? My sister told me about a blog where this woman just said what she does everyday and folks are clambering for it. Dear heavens, I don’t like knowing what I’ve done in the course of a day! In case you’re wondering though, drank coffee, went to see a man about dog (that's Southern for restroom break), wrote a post, not this one, oh, wait - before that I got husband off to work at 5:30AM - on a Saturday!!!! My son was already up watching TV. I went back to bed and couldn’t sleep because I was thinking about my book I’m still not finished writing. Finally got up at 8:15 because I wasn’t in the mood to lie in my own urine. 

See, what I’m saying? Who cares about that junk? OH! I made my kids a space ship with cardboard boxes and duct tape. Which, btw, is duct tape’s achilles heel: cardboard. It don’t do cardboard. Unfortunately ground control here was out of packing tape. No biggie. Wasn’t like Major Tom was coming home anyway. Who cares if the duct tape gave up in the stratosphere? I will post a pic of the mess.

How I imagined it.

How it turned out...

Now, I ask you, does this look like the work of a person that should blog more often? 

Oh well, we'll see how it goes. Stay tuned for another installment...soonish...