Why We Love Daryl

     In the first season of the Walking Dead, if you had told me I would love Daryl as much as I, and millions of Americans, do, I would have asked if there was another Daryl. Yes, I knew of the guy who appeared and behaved as if he were hoping to be cast in an updated version of Deliverance. The only thing that kept me from hating him was his abhorrently racist brother who made everyone around him, including Daryl, seem more charming.  

But, somewhere along the way, that grungy headed rube became our go-to guy. Yes, of course there’s Rick, with all the morals and values that we expect from a hero. We’ve always known we could count on Rick and sadly, that works against him as it can all heroes. More is often expected of him than what is even super-humanly possible. Rick should be the leader. Make a check-list of all the qualities a leader should have and his character will leave a tick by every single one. Daryl? Not so much. But, ironically, that’s exactly why we all love him.

 Daryl Dixon is an anti-hero: everything a hero shouldn’t be and yet nothing less than what’s needed at the time. You pull for him, despite him. You want him to win although he deservingly should lose. He’s, seemingly, in it for himself. Ultimately, his goal is good, but the path he takes to get there is brutal and ruthless. No ideal, no societal standard, and no fellow human (regardless how innocent) will stand in his way. He’s the Han Solo, Walter White, Nurse Jackie, the girl with the dragon tattoo (Lisbeth Salander) and Batman. (You can argue that Batman is a hero all you want. But, whether we like it or not, Batman is in it for vengeance. Yes, he keeps Gotham safe but not so much because he doesn’t want another child to become an orphan as the fact he is one himself. He’s deeply scarred, emotionally off and a lawbreaker. And, like Daryl, that’s why we love him.)

 We love anti-heroes like Daryl because they are flawed, wounded and, as such, completely accessible. They remind us that it’s ok to be messed up, tattered and torn, that our mistakes, our wounds, the cruelty of past circumstances are not who we are. But, they can make us into what we should be, what everyone needs us to be and nobody else can be because they aren’t as completely jacked up as we are. Anti-heroes are survivors which, by definition, have been through something that required them to survive. They have chosen to move forward despite the easy alternative of standing still, taking it, wallowing in it, letting “it” become their identity. We may not like how they chose to do it or what they became as a result, but we respect the fortitude both required.  

 Does it take fortitude to be the good guy? Yes, of course. But when the hero has won the battle, the fight is over until another arises. In that time of peace, his strength of heart and inherent goodness don’t come into play. The anti-hero never stops fighting because he has to fight the inner demons as well. Even when the anti-hero is static, internally they are wrestling with everything that made them who they are. And, on some level, they are eternally trying to make peace with that fact, the fact that, as much as it sickens them, they have to look at that abuse, that horrific injury, illness, accident, incident and time in their life that had to be survived and say thank you. Thank you for burning me until you forged me. That alone is damaging. And, a thing to which most of us mere mortals can completely relate.  

 When everything has gone wrong, we can count on the hero to save the day, to inspire us to be a hero ourselves. But, only the anti-hero, only Daryl, can make us believe that we  actually have the potential to be one. That we don’t have to have a cape or be from Krypton. We don’t have to be the best looking, the quickest, the smartest, the one with the cleanest record. All we have to be is the wreck we are and willing to take the shot. And, if we miss the shot, it’s ok. Nobody expected us to make it anyway and nobody will depend on us to make it the next time. But, sooner or later, we, the anti-heroes, will hit the mark and everyone will see us for what we are: everything we need to be to do what needs to be done. When all seems lost, we won’t back away. We’ve been lost, we’ve done lost, and lost, lost to us. We will shake off the dust, pick up our cross bow, and keep on walking. It’s who we are, it’s how we became who we are. And you can count on us to be that person no matter what because it’s all we know how to be. No cape required.